A new perspective

Just realised how out of date this is (events that inspired te post occured on 21st March this year) but I still think it's worth showing. Let's see how it goes...

This blog hasn't gone the way I planned. I thought I'd enjoy reviewing stuff that people may not usually notice but they haven''t come out as I intended - they're either too harsh, too positive or precisely balanced. What I don't think comes across is how I actually feel about them so I'm just going to write anything that may or not be of interest just so I can commit thoughts that I can't say to other people because they'll get bored or they just won't care (yeah i need to sort that out...) Who knows if anyone's reading this but maybe there's something interesting about reading the word of a young guy who just doesn't really know anything...

Two things have happened lately that have made me consider things differently: I am reading 'The Bloody Chamber (and other stories)' by Angela Carter and experienced a seminar at a university with an unconvential lecturer.
This year, I have been studying Gothic literature and so have felt the need to read every book on the list of suggested texts outside of the three I am studying, which includes 'The Bloody Chamber'

As much as I am enjoying the stories, having studied the Gothic for a while now I can't help spotting the numerous motifs and references which are part of the genre. It made me think how easy it would be if I was studying it for the exam, as they are very blatant - the use of mirrors allow for doppelgangers to be created, the heroines are usually set free from their repressed social circumstances by male dominance, the bloody chamber of the title is used as a reference to the sexual awakenings of virgins and so on. There is stuff of interest but there does seem to me a sense that this is a checklist approach, particularly as Carter applies these to classic fairy tales which are either generally impressive (such as the titular story or eponymous if you want to be technical) or baffling like 'The Tiger's Wife'. The blatant references to other literature also become wearying after constant usage, and this is what worries me.
I cannot say I dislike it, but reading this has made me weary about Gothic literature and just, well, tired - which is a shame because I generally like Gothic literature even if I haven't read 'Frankenstein' yet. Speaking of which...

I recently had a very bizarre day - I found out I had been rejected by a university the day I returned from visiting another.
[I won't name names because anyone who cares about my feelings about them will probably know them already]
Dissapointment was the automatic response but I had enjoyed the open day, even though I was irritated that the sample lecture was on 'Frankenstein' so couldn't contribute as much as I'd liked. No such issues with the seminar as the professor quizzed us on our dedication to literature. I think I passed but frankly he was so entertaining it became irrelevant. The best English teachers I've had are those that I know that I could just talk to for ages about literature and when their passion comes across in their teaching. The most striking thing he said, for me, was when he criticised the use of literary theory - he claimed it made the department a laughing stock and subject to criticisms along the lines of "You're still using Freud? Hey, have you heard? Freud, I know!" It had produced siginificant observations but now he was more interested in hearing students talk about the meaning of the text - what we think the text is about. And that's what we can't do so much.

Now it's true it's still a key part for passing exams but that's all it's really needed for. Rather than just writing about what we think the text is about and how by reflecting the Gothic it is worthy of attention, we have to hit certain notes - there must be a debate (obviously, without debate you can't have progess - how do you know what's right without knowing what's wrong?), we have to talk about language, form and structure (i.e. the book) and we have to adress context (what was important about the period it was written, what's the difference between recepetion at the time and now). Now these are basic things for a literature essay but it doesn't seem like that - it feels like unnecessary information that I need to know to pass the exam. It feels like jumping through hoops, it doesn't feel like I'm enjoying studying the book which I do and I really appreciate the moments when I feel that way.
This is what progression in life is starting to feel like - you can't do what you want to do without going through the beauraucracy, wothout crossing the is and dotting the ts in the way expected from us - how ironic that we study the Gothic with a rational mind.


Phew far too serious, but helpful for me. I'm going to press publish and I'm going to put this out there

The most honest thing I've ever written. Man that makes it sound important.